Points of Awareness to Ponder

5/19/2020 Entry #2

"It Takes Time"

 

Two sessions today, 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the evening. It's 6:32pm.

During meditation, I felt scattered today often thinking about people and past relationships. Then silence and sensation again. I could feel my bodies aches and pains, my feet falling asleep. I am constantly making adjustments, straightening through the spine and center of the body. Then stillness. 

Focusing on breathing, calmness, a sense of dullness, jolts of craving, sensation, back to the breathe again. All of a sudden I can feel an expanding through the front of the forehead and the sides of the head. A focusing on the sensations within the headspace and between the temples.

More chatter, more delusion, and projections. I can see them, and quickly remind myself those are not worthy thoughts to entertain. Then back to concentration again.

An internal visualization came on today and it was incredible. A focus on the organs, where "chakras" and "subdoshas" of "vata" lie. I visualized my stomach and intestines, and there functions. I did my best to feel into the process of digestion, and remembering the foods I ate today. My heart beating, producing its sensation, oxygenating and pumping blood into the body. The thyroid, a butterfly shaped gland in the throat producing its hormones for total bodily function. The whole brain and at the very center, the pineal gland. The place for vision and awakening. Imagining the pinecone shape at the center of the headspace blossoming.  

Can we function in our day to day activities while being so in touch with these centers of energy? As I am typing I feel slightly blanked out, but when I stop and focus I can feel these centers again. A slightly scattered post, but anyways last words to ponder: "points of awareness."